Goodbye Huey

It was really really painful but we have to let go of him.

Here's the story of what really happened... I am sorry for my bad english.

March 3, 2007
I was here in our bedroom when I heard our nanny's daughter shouted "Huey fell off the walker!" I hurriedly get out of the room to get Huey. I saw my brother pick up Huey from the fall. Huey was crying. I am sooo scared at that time. I just hugged him really hard.

March 4, 2007
Evening: Huey started to have fever. I gave him paracetamol every 4 hours.

March 5, 2007
We taught Huey broke his back from the fall thats why we asked the "manghihilot" (the one who massage the body) to take a look at Huey.

March 7, 2007
We bought Huey to his pediatrician at 10am because the fever didn't went down. And he was suffering so much from drinking his milk. I was worried already. The pediatrician said he has a lot of Plegm, thats why she gave Huey an Antibacterial. I continued to gave Huey the medicine the doctor prescribed for 7 days. I am wondering at the time because when the assistant checked his temperature it was normal which is opposite to his temperature at home.

March 8, 2007
We tried the "faith Healer" in our place. Mom told us to try.

March 9, 2007
At 6:00pm we brought Huey to the hospital because he was really losing weight really fast. He doesn't drink his milk nor eat his cereal. I tought he has tonsilitis because when I saw his mouth, it was really swollen. He was also vomitting color brown mucus. He was really dehydrated. I am really really worried. But when the doctor in the ER (not Huey's pedia) said it is only tonsilitis and continue to give him the one which Huey's pedia prescribed. I am relieved because Huey won't be confined to the hospital anymore. We went home knowing Huey will be fine. I gave Huey water and milk by medicine dropper because he can't sip from his bottle. We went to bed by 2:00am.

March 10, 2007
Jun was awakened by how Huey breathe at 4:30am. Jun said it was different from his normal breathing. He taught it was me. He saw a lot of brown mucus in his mouth. Jun waked me up and I hurriedly got the bag of Huey, prepared things needed and we went to the hospital really fast. I am holding Huey and talk to him as much as I can. I told him I love him and hold on. We arrived at the hospital at 5:00am and proceeded to the emergency room. I got pissed off the doctor there because she was so sleepy and kept on yawning. She kept on repeating and repeating her questions about Huey's information. Duh??? Does she know why she's there? Does she know everyone who is in the ER is so worried already and she was taking everything sooo easy? grrr!!

The nurse put the IV in Huey's hand but his veins are collapsed. So she inserted the IV to his feet. She also put oxygen to Huey because he was having difficulties in breathing. We then transferred to a semi-private room. There is no private room available at the time.

Mom went home to get additional things needed for the hospital. I was relieved when I saw Huey fighting back. He was talking to me and smiling and I am happy to see him like that. I was beside him all along. I also lay on his bed because I wanted him near me.

Huey's pedia checked him. She said she will be back because Huey was coping already. After the doctor leaved the room, Jun decided to went home as well... Before Jun leave the room, Huey looked at him really long, without blinking his eyes. I said " Pa, Huey is looking at you." And then Jun leaved the room. After 25 minutes mom went out to call dad and everyone because Mom was feeling different to what Huey looks like. I was with my Uncle Tojoe in the room. I hugged Huey and watched the television and the looked at Huey again. I notice that Huey is not blinking his eyes and he is not breathing anymore. I shouted "Uncle! Uncle! Huey!". Uncle Tojoe called for help. Me? I was on the bed with Huey holding his feet. In total shock I didn't felt anything. I didn't cried, I didn't panicked, I didn't felt anything! I was there for 10 minutes seeing the doctors revive Huey. I saw mom hugging Huey crying... Me? nothing. I didn't felt anything still. Until my aunt asked me to get out. That was the time I burst into tears. I am calling Jun's name as I cry. It was really really painful! I heard the doctor telling us if the doctors should stop pumping Huey already because it was already 5 tries. They told the doctor to wait for Jun.

And then Jun arrived. He went to the room straight and saw Huey without the doctors already. Huey was being prepared to his position and cleaned the blood from his mouth. Jun burst into tears and I went to him and hugged him very very tight. Jun was shaking his head. He cannot accept the fact that he was away when Huey cuts his breath. My mother in law kept on telling us that it was God's plan, that we have to accept it.

We then proceeded to the Funeral Parlor. We stayed in the car crying and crying and crying. My two Uncles bought Huey inside the funeral parlor. They said it will be 6 hours before embalming Huey. We waited there for 6 hours and then we went home.

The coffin wasn't ready yet so we put Huey to the table and covered him with baby net. He looks like he was sleeping so we didn't worry much on him. I am not thinking of Huey a lot because I don't wanna cry. I am not thinking that Huey was gone. I am thinking he was just there sleeping.

There are a lot of children visiting us. They taught Huey was sleeping. I remember one boy told his playmates to keep quiet because Huey was sleeping. I am so happy because they aren't mourning... they are not sad of Huey's passing. I am happy because there are so many people who loves us. I want us to remember Huey with happiness. He was really an angel to us. Goodbye Huey! We will miss you so much! We love you!

To all of those who offered a prayer for Huey and for Jun and I... A big thank you to all of you! It really helps us to cope up. We are still sad about what happened but we are trying to recover. Thank you so much to all of you. Thank you thank you thank you soooo much!

P.S.
On Huey's death certificate, the cause of death was Respiratory Failure and Septocemia(Infection to the blood). But my Sister in law which is a doctor said it might not be Septocemia since they tested Huey's blood friday night. They should told us that his blood was infected. We don't have the copy of the CBC because they got it from us the time the Medical technologist tested Huey's blood.

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26 Responses to “Goodbye Huey”

Ria Maningat-Mojica said...

Hi Diane! I visit your blog regularly to check on how you're coping with the loss of Huey. I cannot even begin to imagine what you're going through, but we will keep on praying for you and Jun to have the strength to continue. I am glad to see you back online, that's a positive sign, I think. Always remember that we are here for you.

Anonymous said...

Diane, napaiyak again ako while reading this. It's really painful to loss someone we love. But hold on.. keep ur strength and faith to God. Take care!--amore

Anonymous said...

I know it is hard to face tomorrow missing someone. May God continue to bless you.

Anonymous said...

Hi dianne. I am so sorry for your loss. One of your readers led me to this page. I too lost a son. He was 6 years old.I lost my son 7 years ago. The grief journey can be daunting without support and an understanding of your grief process.

I can't find your email address. Please contact me soon and if you live in Metro Manila, we can meet up for coffee.

My email address is noemidado@ gmail.com or visit my blog to get in touch with me through my contact form. I know I can never take away the pain you are feeling but talking helps.

Juzahlyn said...

Oh Diane, I just can't help but be teary eyed of the story of what happened to Huey. It must've been so hard to see him like that but like everyone said God has a plan, He has his own reasons. Huey is now an angel and he is surely watching over you and Jun...I know that no words can be enough to heal you but I hope that someday you and Jun could be able to move on...just take your time...we are all here for you

Jenn Valmonte said...

made me go back to what happened to my dad.

it is hard, yes, and it will take time before we can recover from all of it, but eventually, i know we will be okay.

just hang on, friend. be strong, just like what you said to me when my daddy died.

admin said...

Oh Dianne, i know it is hard for your to even recall and post about huey. Pero i can see you a very strong person. If you need us Bebots you know where to find us ha. Lord will give you strength. Take care . JennyL

Joy said...

I am in tears reading your account. May God comfort you and Jun during this very painful time.

Anonymous said...

i am so sorry for your loss... and i know no amount of words can bring that comfort you need... its not bad to mourn, but take "comfort" that your little angel is in a peaceful and safe place now. ((hugs)) to you

Bonnie said...

Dear Diane
Thank you for the comment on my blog. I am so glad that you found those verses encouraging. If you email me with your postal address, I have a book I would like to post you that I feel will really help you through this difficult time and give you some comfort. Please email me at:
bonnie@vestronic.net
I will be happy to post it to you airmail. My heart breaks at reading your tragic story and I cannot believe the irresponsibleness of those doctors and hospital in the way they treated Huey. I really think that you should take the matter further. It is pure negligence. If he had been looked at properly and treated for whatever REALLY was wrong with him (clearly not tonsilities like the hospital told you) then he may have had a chance at survival. I am so deeply sorry once again for your loss and just remember we are here to help you and to listen even if you just need to talk. You can contact me anytime. thank you also for sharing your story and for helping us to realize (being a mom of two myself) how precious life is and every moment with our children are precious and treasured because life is so fragile and fleeting. You are an amazing woman for being so brave and strong. many hugs.

Anonymous said...

God pours life into death and death into life without a drop being spilled. ~Author Unknown

Courage Diane

Mich said...

hi diane! I don't know what to say. I just can't imagine the pain that you're going thru. Just keep in mind that God has plans. We are always here for you!

b3arh0ney said...

reading this made me cry. i can't imagine what you're going through but i'm praying for u and ur family to get through this in time. take care always. {{{{hugs}}}

Josephine said...

Hi Diane, I went to your blog after hearing from fellow N@Wies about what happened to Huey. My heart goes out to you and your family. I can only imagine what you're going through, but please know that so many people have you and your family in their thoughts and prayers. Trust in your faith that God has better plans for Baby Huey, and for your family. Take care.

Anonymous said...

Diane....

I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful little son. Know he is still an angel in Heaven waiting for all of you.

I to have an angel there, so I understand what you are going through and may God bless you and your family during this time of greif and recovery.

My personal email is Southunlady@aol.com

love,
Donna

Anonymous said...

Dianne, I found your blog from Nyree and after reading of your devastating loss I just wanted to say that i am so sorry and that I wish you and your family all the best. It is such a hard thing to go through - I cannot pretend to imagine. I do not even know you and I am in tears. My heart breaks for you. May you find peace withing yourself and know that your darling baby is playing with the angels now looking out for you and his family till you meet again.

Anonymous said...

hi Diane

we may not know one another but sending my prayers to you and we all know that your little one is safe with God now.

*hugs* to you and family.

take care, be strong.

Mickee said...

Hi Diane, like Ria, I check in every now and then to see how you're doing. I'm sure that Huey is looking down from heaven. You now have an angel praying for you.

Take care and God bless!

Anonymous said...

hi diane. i'm so sorry to hear your loss. like you, i lost a daughter too 4 years ago. just remember that we each have our own mission, and be thankful that Huey has accomplished his. take care. God bless.

dexiejane said...

there are no words to express my sorrow for your loss. if you need anyone to talk to email me at dexie76@gmail.com

you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. *HUGS*

Shai Coggins said...

I just read about your story through Christine's blog - http://madcropper.com/ - and decided to follow the link. I couldn't help but burst in to tears reading about what happened to your child and your family, especially seeing those photos of Huey - even though I don't know you. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I've been here and shared grief even if I can't say that I know what you're going through right now. As a mum, I can only imagine the pain that comes with your loss. Take care.

Anonymous said...

hi diane. Our condolences. May God continue to bless you and your family.

Anonymous said...

hi dianne.this is ate jane.rhea ecal and franz' paguio's cuz.franz told me what happened and gave me the link where i can read what really happened.accept my condolences and you are right.everything has a purpose and at least you already have an angel to watch over you.just pray and i will also include in my prayers tah you be strengthened by this incident.to you husband as well, be strong.i cried when i read the story and i felt afraid for my baby as well bec she also fell from her walker i think that was last feb.(franz was here in the phil then) but we consulted her pedia and she gave us symptoms.thank God until now she didnt show any symptoms or signs that may cause me to panick for that incident.I will make sure this time that it will be the first and last fall of my daughter from a walker or not.
God Bless Dianne.

apple said...

Hi Diane,
Just got your link from a n@wie.
I was really in tears upon reading your story. Being a Mom myself, just can't imagine what you're going through right now.
Trust in the Lord, you may never know what His reasons were, but just believe that it's the best for you and Huey.
Our condolences and prayers are with you.

Unknown said...

Diane, I am so sorry to know these. I am lost for words and sorry dahil late ko nang nalaman.
We at PDF are always here for you. Stay strong, girl.
We love you!

Anonymous said...

diane,

you didn't tell me about huey during our chat, why? i feel so insensitive to be talking about myself when you are in mourning, i'm sorry!

i'm sure huey is in a better place now. God be with him and God bless you and jun.